Alternative version of volume 15, Chapter 4, Part 2

In the silent arena, all eyes were on the figure which came forward. And even though for most of the gathered people it was the first time seeing him, there was no question in anyone’s mind as to who the person in front of them was.

He wore a black robe which seemed to suck the light out of its surroundings, in his skeletal hands he held a strange staff, which culminated in seven intertwined snakes, each of which held a gem in its mouth. Through the opening in his robe, a red orb glowing from inside his rib cage could be seen. Behind his head was a halo-like vortex of dark energy.

All in all, he looked like the avatar of death from the stories that would frighten children.

“You… you are alive?! How?” Loras gasped.

“I used my temporary death to give you an illusion of a weakness. And here you are,” Ainz said.

His skinless skull remained unchanged, but everyone could feel that he was smiling.

“We, we came here to help you confront Jaldabaoth,” Loras said after briefly stumbling.

“I don’t need your help against Jaldabaoth. Besides, we both know that’s not why you are here,” Ainz replied.

“What do you mean by this? What other reason could we have?” Loras exclaimed trying to sound indignant.

“Enough of this, I grow tired of the games you humans play,” Ainz said as he waved his hand dismissively.

“It’s time!” He said in a loud voice which echoed throughout the arena.

The red points of light in his empty eye sockets seemed to burst with energy. Ainz extended his hand and cast a spell.

[Grasp Heart]

Kegor Elan Bosk, the captain of the Windflower Scripture, who stood near Loras, slowly slumped to the ground. A woman cried out in surprise and rushed to his side to check on him.

“He’s dead!” Berta exclaimed in shock.

Everyone looked back at Ainz and noticed that in his outstretched hand he was holding something – a red, round object. It was the still beating heart of the victim of his spell. After a moment it took for this information to sink in, the arena was filled with shouts of surprise, anger, and fear.

“Kill him! Everyone, attack!” Loras shouted in a voice which instantly turned hoarse.

[Grasp Heart] [Grasp Heart] [Grasp Heart] [Grasp Heart]

Ainz responded to their shouts by casting the spell over and over. Lifeless bodies slumped to the ground, like puppets with their strings cut, but it didn’t stop the fighters of the allied forces from rushing forward.

[Double Grasp Heart]

Ainz cast a spell with both of his hands outstretched, a heart appeared in each of his palms and two more attackers fell.

“Mwa-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha! Get rekt noobs!” Ainz shouted while laughing maniacally.

[Fly]

He cast a spell and took to the air before the melee fighters could engage him.

“I am the Avatar of Death! Know true despair and repent your arrogance!” Ainz yelled from the sky while continuing to cast his spell.

“Use spells to bring him down!” Loras bellowed in anger.

“We are, but it’s not working! He must have magical immunity or something,” the third seat of the Black Scripture shouted back.

[True Dark]

Yavon made his move. A column of dark energy descended on Ainz and engulfed him briefly.

“True Dark? Oh, no, I need to be careful, I can die here,” Ainz exclaimed in a panicked voice. “If I was afk for like an hour, that is! “Mwa-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha!” He added before going back to his crazed laughter.

“We can’t bring him down, what do we do?” Someone screamed in a voice filled with despair.

“Scatter, run for your lives. We must bring news of his true power to the Cardinals!” Loras bellowed his command.

I guess I won’t get a chance to test myself against Shalltear Bloodfallen, Brain thought, as he ran.

Brain-san!” He heard Climb shout, but his mind was already too foggy to understand what happened.

“I won’t run! I have this,” Climb exclaimed as he pulled out his pocket watch. However, before he could activate the magic item he was hit by a spell and collapsed to the ground.

“Forgive me, Renner-sama,” he whispered as he thought of his mistress.

[Crystal Dagger]

Evileye cast her spell, but the magical dagger shattered before it could reach Ainz.

“Just like back then,” Evileye mumbled as she recalled her fight against Jaldabaoth. She cursed at how weak she was, but now was not the time for self-mockery.

“Run, run and try to survive!” Evileye shouted to the other members of Blue Rose.

They didn’t argue with her and began to move right away. However, it was too late, after taking a few steps Tia fell to the ground.

“Noooo!” Tina shouted as she rushed to the side of her sister.

A moment later she too collapsed to the ground silently. The remaining three members of Blue Rose stared at the horrific sight in front of them in shock. Gagaran was the first to snap out of it.

“Run! Escape! If we die here, their deaths will be meaningless!” She shouted, grabbed the others and pulled them after herself.

“Mwa-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha! There will be no escape! This arena is where you will die,” Ainz shouted from the sky as he continued to rain death from above.

[Grasp Heart]

Ainz aimed a spell at a hooded figure, one of the Zuranon members. However, to his surprise the figure didn’t fall to the ground, it just froze as if stunned.

“What the…?!” Ainz cursed in surprise.

[Reality Slash]

The stunned figure was cut in half, revealing the reason the previous spell didn’t kill it – it was a skeleton.

Hmm, interesting, they had more than one undead among their members, Ainz thought as he continued the massacre.

The number of people in the arena was quickly decreasing. Everyone was trying to scramble to escape, but doing so proved impossible. Ainz had quickly shot down those who tried to use [Fly] magic. Meanwhile, those who tried to climb the walls of the arena and escape that way were tossed back into the arena by the golems which made up the audience of this deathly spectacle.

There were only three figures who didn’t panic: Yavon, who continued to cast spell after spell, and Zesshi, who was unwilling to run away from a fight. Especially not after she noticed that Mare was watching from the VIP section of the arena. The last one was Sir Armoreth, who just stood there calmly as if what was happening was of no concern to him.

Loras did his best to escape, but he wasn’t able to get past the golems and was thrown back into the hell that was the arena floor. He watched as members of the two Scriptures were killed one by one. Suddenly, he felt like all the energy was sapped from his body. He tried to use his spear to prop himself up, but he couldn’t even lift his hand. Silently, he collapsed.

I am sorry, we have failed the Six great Gods, he thought as his vision turned dark.

Evileye ran after Gagaran until the muscled woman stumbled and fell to the floor. Still, she pushed on, even when Lakyus fell, Evileye pushed on. She reached the wall of the arena and cast [Fly] immediately taking to the skies.

I have to escape, I must escape or their deaths will be in vain, she told herself over and over. This chant was the only thing keeping her sane. She began to fly out of the arena, but then her body stiffened and she fell down. Still stiff, the golems tossed her back into that hell hole.

Ah, that’s right, I am undead, the death spell he’s using won’t work on me. I wonder, where is Momon-sama, Evileye suddenly thought. She scanned the arena looking for the mighty figure of her beloved, but before she could locate him her vision shifted.

“What?” Evileye said in surprise as she saw her own decapitated body slump to the ground.

“Yes, yes! Repent your own weakness and die in despair!” Ainz screamed as he descended from the sky.

He floated a few yards above the ground in front of the only three figures remaining in the arena. He looked like something out of a nightmare as he stared down at them.

“You think you are all that?” Sir Armoreth spoke. “Just because you can kill a bunch of puny humans? Laughable.”

[Grasp Heart]

Ainz replied by casting his spell. However, Sir Armoreth continued to stand still, though he was stunned.

“Like I said, laughable,” Armoreth said after the effects of stun wore off.

“Begone, annoying bug,” Ainz replied.

[Reality Slash] [Black Hole]

Sir Armoreth was cut in half, and then both halves were sucked into the black hole which appeared next to his body. Now, only two figures remained.

“I am undead, that Grasp Heart spell of yours won’t work on me,” Yavon said in a mocking tone.

Trying to mock Ainz was the only thing he could do by now.

“Oh, really?” Ainz asked with a chuckle.

“Undead are immune to all death spells. That is the law of this world, and not even an unholy abomination like you can change that,” Yavon replied with a laugh.

“Then, prepare to have your mind blown,” Ainz laughed.

[The Goal of All Life is Death] [Grasp Heart]

Yavon stared in confusion at the clock-like contraption which appeared behind Ainz. The hand of the clock quickly moved through the number until it reached midnight, then the clock disappeared. Yavon was about to mock the other undead when he realized that he was falling to the ground.

What? What the hell is this? How is this possi… his mind went blank before he could finish his thought.

Zesshi tightened the grip on her scythe. If I am destined to die here, I won’t die like a coward, running away, she thought. However, it seemed like Ainz had a different idea.

“You are the one called Zesshi, right?” Ainz asked as he descended to the ground and walked up to her.

“Um, yes, that’s me,” she replied, unsure of what was happening.

“Good. So, um, you see, in a few decades Mare is going to hit his teenage years and someone will need to give him the talk about birds and bees… yeah, and I’d rather it not be me,” Ainz spoke in a quiet voice.

“Mm,” Zesshi made an uncertain noise. What is he talking about? She wondered.

“Mare seems to like you, so, I thought, maybe you could be the one to teach him, you know, about sex,” Ainz coughed as he finally said it.

Sex? He wants me to become Mare’s concubine? Zesshi thought as her face turned red. She thought about Mare and the time she spent with him. I guess it wouldn’t be too bad to spend my life at his side, she thought as she turned even redder.

Uh, oh, now I’ve gone and done it. Look at how embarrassed she is. I bet she thinks I am some kind of pervert, Ainz sighed to himself. He really wasn’t sure how to talk to women about such things.

“I, I accept,” Zesshi said while looking at her shoes.

“You do? Excellent!” Ainz exclaimed. Whew, looks like I’ve dodged that bullet, he thought. I wonder if Zesshi would be willing to give the talk to Aura too? Well, I’ll ask her another time, Ainz thought.

Meanwhile, in the VIP section of the arena, all of the floor guardians were elated after watching the massacre.

“It’s Ainz-sama’s complete victory,” Sebas said excitedly.

“Completely. Owned.” Cocytus exclaimed as he exhaled cold air.

“Ainz-sama looks so magnificent when he’s serious like that,” Albedo said lovingly.

“I know, I can barely contain my excitement,” Shalltear moaned.

Demiurge didn’t say anything, but the grin on his face clearly showed how proud he was to serve such a master.

“He totally rekt those noobs,” Aura said cheerfully.

“A-Ainz-sama is so merciful, even as he slaughtered them, he made sure they would f-feel no pain,” Mare added in his panicky voice.

***

Many, many miles away from the Great Tomb of Nazarick, in the treasury of the floating city, which once served as the base of the Eight Greed Kings, a majestic looking dragon opened his eyes. He stood up from his bed of treasures and roared angrily.

“You think you are all that just because you’ve killed my alt?” He shouted angrily at an invisible opponent. “Now, you will face the power of my main!”

“No one gets to call me an annoying bug and live,” he continued to roar.

“It’s war now!”

“Dragon Lords vs Nazarick, baby!”

21 Comments on “Alternative version of volume 15, Chapter 4, Part 2

    • Hahaha, Ainz the fucking boss in all his glory. OoO
      I got a bit confused with Ainz vs Yavon, but the image of Ainz flying and destroying everyone was very inspiring.

  1. I was not expecting this when I saw there was a new update but I am very happy that you did this because it was really funny.

  2. Lolz :3

    I must confess: you original version is much much better, but this is also fun. Papa Bone Daddy going all crazy grasp hearting everyone xD

  3. AH-HA-HA-HA-HA-HA-HA-HA-HA-HA-HA-HA-HA-HA-HA-HA-HA!!!

    An old fantasy “scene I’d like to see” has finally come true!

    This was absolutely DIVINE!

      • Just the usual places…

        … Peeping into high school girls’ locker rooms, lurking outside elementary school playgrounds, violating sexy-looking knotholes in the local park…

        …and monitoring my network of hidden cameras in yours and everyone else’s bedrooms and bathrooms.

  4. This story is funny, but I prefer the other one… I have a question. Ainz staff (the real one) has the ability to stregthen racial abilities, so wouldn´t that also aply to his magic and damage nulification (right now he cannot be hurt by attack or person of at last 60 lvl with few exceptions like Gazef sword)?

  5. Omg, “get rekt noobs” this has me laughing the entire time, and oh baby, I can’t wait to see Nazarick vs Dragon lords!!! So goood

  6. Somehow the pace of this alternative chapter seems too rushed, and less…. well, epic. And normally, one would need to take a dozen of paragraph or more to be able to fully explain the true terror of Ainz :v. So, you

  7. this actually made me think something… if you used goal of all life is death on sir armoreth… i mean its armor that is being controlled by some 1… would the link be cut or the controlled dies?

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